The sweetness that is death

You make my day, every single day
You're the love of my life, the air that I breathe
Am I just fearful, of being alone?

You're the object of my sympathy
The taker of my pittance
Is it just my deeds, that need cleansing?

I love the labour that I do
It makes me famous, gives me meaning
Is it just a surrogate, for another broken dream?

It's a painful life
For every moment of happiness,
Is an eternity of sorrow
Isn't it a barter, for the sweetness that is death?

Freakshow

You look up at that flag
Your heart brimming with patriotism
You could've been born elsewhere
Dancing to a different rhetoric,
Revelling in another anthem.

You're happy with your life
Insurance paid for that vacation
You could've been there around 1929
And have massacred your way,
Through the Great Depression.

You love your parents
And they love you back
You could've been an orphan,
Knocking on doors at Thanksgiving;
Felt up by paedophiles otherwise.

She's the love of your life
You can't imagine away
The very thought makes you cry
You could've missed that bus,
And picked up amorous flesh the rest of your life.

All life's a freakshow
Could've turned out so different
Death - now THAT, is certain.
How do you manage to live,
When you know .... it's coming?

Que tal

Took my spanish level 1 exam today.
El clase de nivel dos empieza proxma semana.

Have lost about 2-3 kgs after 12 days of fasting.
Un poco mas de dos semanas queda.

Never to rise

When the stars fall
Constellations explode
The sunshine never finds you
Hope, with all your faith

When today's all you have
Yesterday's a blur
Tomorrow may never come
Live, with all you have

When everything's yours
Every roll is 7 or 11
And she's finally in your arms
Fear, the coming that is death

When you know it's about to end;
Your life as you know it
When the sun's about to set,
Never to rise
What do you do then?

Pick of the week

The best there is, the best there was, the best there ever will be!

Weak narcissist

Despise me with all your scorn
Treat me with disdain
I judge you everyday
In every shameful way.

Hate me with all you passion
Feed me to the scavengers
I weigh you by what adorns you
By the numbers that destroy.

Love me with all your fire
Touch me, with your lips
It's a facade, my strength
I'm a weak narcissist; it's the most pitiful kind

Knock Knock

This one's original...promise!

Knock Knock
Whos there?
Noc
Noc who?
Knockturnal creature on the lose!

Again and again

You look for perspective
Horizons blur.

You look for acceptance
But hate the sight of you.

You walk in a crowd
You're still a loner.

You abdicate
The desire for redemption, remains just that.

There's no respect for you
You're only as big as your numbers.

You try to rise above them, again and again
Numbers define you, again and again

Nothings

It's amazing how much clarity of mind
A little extra sleep can give you.

Before you learn anything else in life,
Learn how to say NO

Life's a jigsaw,
Things ultimately start falling into place.
Ultimately.

Just discovered
I'm cell phone crazy.

Smelly Cat - Pheobe Buffet

(Bless the guy who wrote this)

Three, four...

Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
What are they feeding you?
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat
It's not your fault

They won't take you to the vet
You're obviously not their favorite pet
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
It's not your fault

You may not be a bed of roses
You're not friend to those with noses
I'll miss you before we're done
Or the world will smell as one

Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
What are they feeding you?
Smelly Cat, Smelly
CatIt's not your fault(Phoebe)
Oh are we done?

One, two, what's that smell?

Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
What are they feeding you?
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat
You're getting fat

I think that I'm gonna be sick
It's your ears, and nose and pick
Part of it, tempt me
One, two, what's that smell?

All the dogs in the neighborhood
Are saying this for your own good
What, you're fat, so you can't run
No fun, I bet, No fun

Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
Porno makes you eat like that
I saw you in the shopping mall

Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
It's not your fault,
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
It's not your fault
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
It's not your fault

We know what was in your food
They say it might affect your mood

You smell like something dead (3x)

One, two, what's that smell?
(Phoebe)Yeah, that's not the song

Fear

Surrounded by invalids
Suffocation
Pity
Fear

Why do you give
And give and give?
Is it hope for redemption;
A feeble one at that?

Or is it fear
That you might turn into
What you're looking at
Death looks a little better now, doesn't it?

Are they our gateways to eternal bliss?
Guinea pigs of nature?
Do they suffer for what they send forth?
The metamorphosis of our worst fears, perhaps?

Pick of the week

Power

You don't need to justify to anybody
The things that you do.
And there's no need to
Justify that either.

You don't need to prove to anyone
That you're worth it.
You are the power
And that needs no proving too.

Deja Vu

It's one of those days
Want to write so much,
Thoughts paralyze
Just when I felt a breakthrough coming.

Deja Vu
Been meaning to say a lot of things,
To a lot of people
Time runs out
Some die on me, others waiting to.

What is it that stops me,
From being me?
Me
Me stops me from being me.

The urge is always there
To be what is intrinsic
The thrust is always there
To be as they would like me too.

Guess who wins.

Destined to become what I'm turning into?
A buffoon by instinct?
A cynic by habit?
So objective, it's almost a crime?

The absence of wild laughter;
Bereft of eyes with tears;
Looking for meaning and purpose;
...

Instinct leads me to refuge in the crowd
A lot of eyes, all so different
I am what they want me to be
Turning into a chameleon; Losing me.

What does one find solace in?
Numbers, that in retrospect
Are just numbers after all?

Deja Vu
Thoughts paralyze.
Just when I felt a breakthrough coming

Sideshow Bob

"Attempted murder? Now honestly, what is that? Do they give a Nobel Prize for attempted chemistry?"

Shadow of what you hate

Things never change
Travelling the same coach
Lookin' the same people
Things never change.

Technology has me in it's shackles
See, that pixel's out of focus!
The keyboard's my touch therapist
El television es ahora mi familia.

Driving on four wheels
Feel more tied down than ever
Need to free the mind
A one way ticket, riding the brain wave

Don't wanna preach
Don't wanna teach
Do so,
And you're a shadow of what you hate.

Blind

An eye for an eye makes the world blind.

Teatotaller

I'm a teatotaller; I drink only tea.
hehehe

The better life

Newspapers and television
Shouting out loud
Telling me what to do
Thinkin for me, playing me for a fool.

People come visiting
Telling me to get a better life
What's a better life-
The number of zeroes in my pocket?

Waking up every morning
Working half assed
Something's wrong somewhere
Is it me, is it you?

Planned a lot of stuff
For the mid life crisis,
The seven year itch,
The belly,
The retirement.

Whatever happened to me
Like I could stop it all happening
Start living
Get the better life.

Need

Need a change; need it fast!

Sleeping Cats

Don't ask

I'm sad today
Don't ask me why.

I'm living today
Some day I'm gonna die.

From the Jay Leno Show

Paris Hilton submitted an appeal to Governor Shwarzenegger to pardon her jail sentence.
Isn't it amazing! She knew who the Governor was!

Mother's day just went by, caused a lot of trouble at telephone exchanges - with orphans all over the world ... calling Angelina Jolie.

Paris Hilton was saved a lot of the trouble others have to go through in prison. Like dental checkups and medical ... the doctors went - oh we've seen it all in the video!

I'm quite funny you know

The other day someone was telling me how Steffi Graf always wore decent clothes on court and nothing revealing or distasteful.
Yeah, thats 'coz global warming hadn't kicked in then!

The grass is always greener on the other side?
Go work across a desert!

Couple o'good Simpsons' episodes

Saw a couple o'good Simpsons episodes lately-

1 - Krusty's Bar-Mitzwah (Extra special appearance by Mr. T)
2 - Homer gets mauled by a bear and then gears for revenge

The Urge

Resisted the urge to smoke today...was really stressed at work, the urge had to come.

What I've been upto

Enjoyed the rains...Just love the monsoon.

Watched Die-Hard 4.0 - Could've been a little shorter, but still a must watch for me.
My favourite scene/dialogue in the movie - A distraught McClane turns to his hacker buddies to start coming up with a plan, placing his hand over the webcam as he talks. He's interrupted by the villain, Thomas Gabriel (Timothy Olyphant). 'Mr McClane, covering the camera does not turn off the microphone.'

Spanish classes are going on well.

'M seriously considering getting a new job and quitting my present one - Not necessarily in that order.

Feeling better now, the flu's worn off - Thanks all for the Get Well Soons.

Smoked just one cigarette in 13 days - On my way to quitting for good? Maybe - lungs feel good, can breathe freely again, can do with brushing just once a day, lips are edging towards a sexy pink , digestion has improved.

Thinking of migrating to another country in 4 years - subject to change.

Money is futile.

Time spent in prayer is time well spent.

Feel the need to be with a woman, if only for some time.

Will change the blog name in the near future.

Whats new

Haven't had a proper workout in three weeks.
Down with flu, B.P. on the lower side.
Started spanish classes.

Perverse

She returns home in three hours twenty five minutes,
Flashes the tube.

People praying everywhere,
Morning, day and night.

Her doggy pack up there's a matter of national debate,
You need to slim down,
Have you watched as closely your plate?

You've probably counted the seconds of her flight,
The hair in her brows, the steps in her marathon.

Get a life. Have a fling.
Take your kids out.

I got a question for you.
You even know the names of her fellow astronauts?
Patriotism grows perverse with time.

Too weak to contemplate

Seconds pass by, they will take my life some day.
My strength too weak to resist.

The smiles and faces will fade away some day.
My memory too weak to recollect.

Will I be the tragic Corleone or the villanous Nemo.
My imagination too subtle to fathom.

Will I be forgotten, am I even remembered.
My heart too weak to contemplate.

Today

Reflected on life
Closed 5 tickets
Got wet in the rain
Slept in the evening
Skipped Gym

Downloading some songs
Listening to a sad ghazal

Alter Ego

Stop drifting! Plan your life!

Drifting

The past few weeks have been very different than the usual hustle and bustle of work and other things. I've had the opportunity to sit back and take stock of things that have been going on.

As I see many of my friends and colleagues frantically planning their lives and striving to take themselves forward, I too get the feeling that something must be done. My impulse was, then, to truly touch upon what I want out of life.Naturally, I tried to unravel what the people around me wanted and assumed that maybe I want something on the same lines for myself.

So what is it that I see around me? People frantically turning the pages of education magazines, doing the rounds of management coaching institutes, preparing for exams that would take them abroad, not to mention getting ready for some caustic and mildly humiliating questions that would be asked in the consulate, striking off words like Vietnam, Bay of Pigs, Afghanistan and Iraq from their vocabs ... a seemingly endless list.

What is it that we ask ourselves when we take such decisions in life? Probably nothing. The lure of big money, good positions, a lush life seems simply too much to resist. But what's the motivation? Why do you want to do what you want to do?

I don't know about others, but the only answer that matters to me is to the question - 'Would I do it for free?' If the answer's yes, then that's what I'm going to do...

And that's quite consistent with the way I've lived my life thus far. My parents decided which school I'd go to, I just took up what my friends took up in junior college and graduation, and took the first job that came my way.

Am I perturbed by the fact that my friends are going place, or atleast are on their way? No.
Would I live my life another way if I had to? Don't think so.
Do I regret the least bit not having thought out my life a little more. Naah.

I'm a drifter. It's fun.

Groovy

I'm accessing blogger through one of those proxies...Apparently routed through some German server. Needless to say the interface is all German and makes me feel like i've walked straight into Lost in Translation. Groovy

A little over a minute ago i was reeking all the cynicism that I had accumulated in my life and now i'm feeling Groovy. It's a good start.

BTW, I love my new phone. As mentioned the joystick's a little hard, but the overall package packs quite a punch.

I'm nearing a 100 posts on the blog !!!

Deserving

I've been an impossibly pathetic cynic for most of my life, and deserve a lot of the shit that's happened to me.

So I'm Fickle Minded

After about two and a half months of research on the Sony Ericsson K550i and W710i, I ended up purchasing the W700i.

Quite an affordable walkman phone at Rs. 9800/-

Pros -

*Fast music transfer from PC to phone

*2mx camera with protective slide on cover for the lens; flash

*FM

*Shipped with 512MB memory card (Phone memory 34 MB)

*Comfy keypad

*Great earphones (Blocks out most noises)

*Orange backlight (BY FAR my favourite colour!)

Cons -

*No autofocus on camera (But the picture quality is still great, the flash took some good shots even with only a 12 inch tube light lit in my room)

*The joystick takes some getting used to, but compared to what the phone offers, one can (and should) neglect this.

*No EDGE/GPRS. Only has WAP 2.0 and XHTML browser. (I'd personally prefer a laptop to a cellphone if I ever wanted to be connected on the move)

Cheap trivia -

*One of the few phones that looks better in hand than on screen.

TIP - Don't go for the K550i. It may have the works, but the keypad is the worst in cell-phone history.

Probably my next cell phone

Mobile junkies can do well to visit http://www.mobile-review.com/review-en.shtml.

It's a simply awesome site by Eldar Murtazin. Very objective reviews, and he's torn some apparently awesome mobiles to shredzzzz!

Note to Self

No squatting if I have office the next day!

Garble Garble

Bometimes life's such a sore
Conotonous to the more
Hike Layden -
Fho's always smashing fhem tor a wour.

Plubber Gang loes in cublic
Crying I fity the pool!
The sest bight on TV -
Sish of a fchool.

This is shere I start to wuffer
What they ball a writers clock
Much torse than the wraffic outside
That to bay the least, is choc-a-sloc

Damascus it is

Sitting on the toilet seat
In the office bathroom
What's one to do
When the toilet paper runs out?

Someone once told me
Life's not what you make of it,
It's how you take it
Ok. I'm sitting on a rock - it's soft as a marshmellow.

What is it that I really want
A bed of roses? A palace of diamonds?
Or anonymity in Damascus?
Yeah. Damascus it is.

Face it, Marge!

Face it, Marge. Catholics rule! We got Boston, South America, the good part of Ireland, and we're makin' serious inroads in Mozambique, Baby!

Dyslexic Dreams

I want to jump of a cliff
Feel my body cut through the wind
My soul dissolving in bliss
See the ground coming closer and closer

I want to jump of a cliff
Again and again
Survive to tell the tale
Again and again

I want to open my eyes
Look at and admire
The beauty that is the world
Or whatever is left of it

I want to sit with you, hand in hand
No, Don't talk now
Let's just look at that Cheshire Cat
It may be the last time that we do

There're scapegoats everywhere
I blame pollution for my confusion
Fascism for my naive fatalism
Caeser for my broken geyser

What was I even thinking
Am I the Byronic hero?
Or maybe just vice principal Nero

What's my twisted realm?
Points in space, Contaminated streams?
For now, I'd rather just slip back
To those intoxicating dyslexic dreams

Shoooooe... Koi Hai !

Ha-Ha

He who Ha-Ha's last Ha-Ha's best. - Nelson Muntz

Simpsons - The Movie

Here's a gist of the movie trailer (will upload the link to it in the next post):

The teaser begins with the camera panning closely over the Superman "S" insignia, while a voice-over actor dramatically announces "In 2007, leaping his way onto the silver screen, the greatest hero in American history."

This is meant to give the impression of the trailer being for Superman Returns, one of the high-profile releases of the summer of 2006.

The shot then zooms out to show Homer, wearing only a tiny Superman T-shirt and briefs, sitting on his couch. He blinks and timidly states, "I forgot what I'm supposed to say!"

The words "The Simpsons" appear, followed a moment later by the word "Movie" in large letters, as simultaneously the announcer says "The Simpsons Movie Opening worldwide, July 27, 2007." Homer is heard in the background, saying "Uh oh, we'd better get started!" It then displays the release date, while Mr. Burns says "excellent" in the background.

You missed The Red Dress Press?

Did you just say you missed The Red Dress Press?
Lisa may have opened a press in this one...
But it's an out and out Monty Burns' special
Excellent (Burns' Style)

Need to switch my thoughts

Watched the NatGeo special on Anacondas and Resticulated Pythons last night.
You dont want to get in a tangle with one of those!

So here's the gist of what I saw:

1 - The measured squeeze force of a female Anaconda shown was 8000 pounds/sq inch. That would be equivalent to a pickup truck standing on your chest.

2 - Did I forget to mention that Anacondas constrict for AT LEAST 10 - 15 minutes without letting off? That would make it a pickup truck standing over your chest for 15 minutes. Groovy!

3 - They can hold their breath in water for about an hour and go a year without eating...So the'r the real experts on Yoga and crash dieting!

4 - Both Anacondas and Resticulated Pythons shoot out their wind pipes while swallowing their prey to facilitate breathing... Who needs oxygen masks?

5 - I actually saw pt-4. happening on TV.

6 - Need to switch my thoughts over from pt-5. to Penelope Cruz before I puke.

The best things in life are free

You are born on Friday the 13th
Does it make you less of a human?
More of a monster
Castigated for time to come

You score a 01 out of a 10
Are you then fit to be deemed a failure?
A punching bag for life
A somebody, bordering on being a nobody

You wake up to the sound of a billion diamonds
Does that make you any different?
You're still going to die
And the diamonds will buy happiness nor life

You've taken a hundred lives
Does it take away your right to live?
Or give me the right to bay for your blood
Sometimes I forget- I'm human; I can take a thousand lives as easy as you've taken a hundred.

You can barely afford a loaf of bread
Does that make you unfortunate, sir?
The best things in life are free-
The invisible air, pristine water, ticking time and coveted death.

You set goals you could never achieve
Does it warrant manic depression?
I know of a king who built his heaven on earth
And died a whisker before stepping into it.

The Red Dress Press

Saw The Simpsons after a looong time today... the one where Lisa opens up her own newsletter publication - The Red Dress Press.

Killer Workout

Had a great workout yesterday. Managed to get a good nights sleep the night before, making the exercises all the more effective.

Did HeavyLegs + Moderate to Heavy Biceps

Legs:

Warm up:
Good Mornings, Free hand dead lifts, Basic Hamstring Stretches
Routine:
1 - Alternate Barbell Squat(Heavy to Very Heavy) and Hamstring Curls(Medium)
10x3 each
2- Seated Calf Raise (Heavy to Very Heavy)
10x3

Biceps:

Warm up:
A variation of wide-handed chin ups -> Instead of lifting yourself up vertically, lift yourself to one side first using only the shoulder, chest, back and bicep muscles of that side, and then lift to other side.
Routine:
1 - Lying Cable Curls (Medium to Heavy)
2 - Dumbbell Prone Incline Curls (Light to Medium)
3 - Standing One Arm Dumbbell Curls over incline bench (Light to Medium)
4 - Barbell Curls (Medium to Heavy)
5 - Alternate Hammer Curls (Heavy)
6 - Concentration Curls (Light)
All 10x3

Caution: Do NOT attempt any of the above without assisstance of a trainer. And don't even think about it if you are a beginner.

Appalled

India knocked itself out of the world cup.
I'm appalled.
Not at the loss - I don't even consider it one.

I'm appalled.
At the peoples' reaction.
It's only a sport. Just entertainment.
Do we even need to react to such things?

The yellow duckling

Witness an infant
Nothing ceases to amaze it
It's fascinated everyday, by the very same moon
The very same life

It strives to reach out
To the object of its marvel
Incoherent movements
A spark in the eyes

It tries and tries
The hands just don't grip
But it doesn't lose heart
It tries and tries

Every fibre in its body
Wants to hold that yellow little duckling
So much enthusiasm, so much innocence
A desire so pure, makes me wonder

I settle on a dream
The head wants it,
The heart is indifferent,
The limbs couldn't care less

I strive for my yellow duckling
That I can hold on to;
That every part of me
Can desire with no remorse

Two smoking barrels

No one ever saw time
It's one of those things that are, but are not
You can't see it, touch it, feel it
But it's out to get you, lock-stock and two smoking barrels

No one ever saw thoughts
They cast a web in your head and around your life
Thoughts breed resentment, contempt, malice
They come with those big labels - Unavoidable, Fatal

No one ever seen themselves
I is just a reflection of the world
The self is lost in the battle for survival
Me is no more, got killed by time the moment thoughts took over

Tricep Blooper

I was working out in the gym a few months ago - had resumed work-outs after almost a month of a right shoulder pain.

It was triceps day and I was doing the skull crusher ( For those who don't know what a skull crusher is, it's here.)

After a month out of action, you can't really be the same. When I was lowering the bar down towards the end of the 1st set, I somehow lost control and the bar landed PLONK on my forehead. Lucky for me I hadn't lost grip of the bar!

Don't know what made me remember this :)

FYI - The skullcrusher is the best exercise for triceps after parallel bar dips.

Pretense

I contemplate
My life hitherto
Delusional laughter, unkept promises
Not a soul to turn to.

Tears of blood
Can't keep them inside, too proud to let them flow
Pretenses of strength
Weakening me through and through.

Is happiness the end of sorrow?
Laughter the end of tears?
Some eclipses stay on-
Chisel me, wither me, define me.

The sun sets everyday
Instilling hopes of serene loneliness, intoxicating isolation
Surmising I do achieve it,
Will I not long to share it?

Just got one of these

The big race

Ever felt that surge of thoughts running through your head that compel you to take stock?

It feels like that NFS underground game- you're travelling at a break-neck speed, you can see the bright lights around you; they're pretty to look at but you can't make any sense out of them.

You're travelling at great speeds and you love it, but why the hell are you going so fast? What's the fricken' motivation?

Why the hell should you be part of the race? Just because you happen to be on the start line and the numbers 3-2-1 come flashing on your screen? Just because all the others around you hit the accelerator when it comes down to 3-2-1?

Let them race. I'll park my car in the pit-lane and go catch my favourite burger with chilli sauce and a soda.

Nicotine Dreams

You take a drag.
Feel the high.
Blow out the smoke.
What's left behind is a smelly butt and lungs full of poison.

Why

Why blame?
Why not accept, look in the mirror and give yourself a smile.

Why look for a punchin' bag?
Why not take a moment, think over and start afresh.

Why dread the punches?
Why not wipe the blood, and keep going.

Why be lonely?
Why not take yourself out to a movie, a dinner and then a smoke.

What if?

What if you fall so hard,
It kills pain itself?

What if you fail so bad,
It's an accomplishment in itself?

What if you hate so much,
You start loving hate itself?

What if you try so hard.
You fall just before succeeding?

What if you sin so much,
Redmeption is not on option?

What if you be with so much passion,
You are your own planet?

I don't wanna work ! WAAAHAAAAA Sob

How many times I've felt like putting of my cell phone and sitting at home.
Felt like coming to office but spending 10 hours lounging in the cafeteria.
Like coming dressed in a jumper on a Monday.
Not dressing at all on a Friday.

Like saying Woohoo! when the system crashes.
Shouting Show Me the Money! when it's 1/x/yz.
Saying Eat my Shorts when I'm given a task.

Discussing chocolates and Scarlett Johansson in team meetings.
Debating advantages of smoking over not.
Of sleeping over working.
Of breakups over pregnancy.

Aye Caramba!

I'm Bart, who are you? by NoHomers.net

Muhammad Ali

"I've seen George Foreman shadow boxing and the shadow won"

"I'm so fast that last night I turned off the light switch in my hotel room and was in bed before the room was dark"

"There are two things that are hard to hit and see. That's a spooky ghost and Muhammad Ali"

"I done wrestled with an alligator, I done tussled with a whale, Only last week I murdered a rock, injured a stone, hospitalized a brick. I'm so mean I make medicine sick"


Before The Rumble In The jungle October 1974.

Ecstacy

2/13/07, 05:50 AM: Two chunks of Toblerone
2/13/07, 08:10 AM: A Snickers mini bar
2/13/07, 08:20 AM: One Dark, one Kisses.
2/13/07, 08:30 AM: Ecstacy. MMMMMMM....Chocolate....AGGHHHGH

-Someone please suggest a title for this-

When the road ahead is long and lonely,
When the one behind is lost but yearned,
When now is just an abyss of nothingness,
Will you walk with me?

When disillusion overthrows enthusiasm,
When regret shadows the light of life,
When every breath I fear to breathe,
Will you cry with me?

When my reflections fail to recongize me,
When my evolution I can't fathom any more,
When I am mass more than soul,
Will you smile at me?

When life doesn't make sense any longer,
When moments that I refused come to define my life,
When the life that I lived adds up to only a void,
Will you live with me?

When I finally realise the futility of it all,
When life comes across more as an accident than design,
When death seems more a journey than an end,
Will you dance with me?

It ain't over 'til it's over.

Promising to get better

In about 3-4 months, I'll be shifted another team.
You know what that means? No night shifts!!! No working weekends!!!
Better still, I'll get to do some pretty good work - Hopefully :)

Thank You

For believing in me when no one else did.
For sticking by me when the world ran out.

For holding my hand when I felt lonely.
For lending a shoulder when the tears didn't stop.

For listening to my nonsense, which somehow made a lot of sense to me.
For comforting me when the realization finally dawned.

For supporting my ambitions, with cynisism nor doubt.
For praying a prayer, for me and only me.

For calling me up, and letting the lid blow.
For calling again, and apologizing for the freak show.

For confiding in me, your resentments and heartaches.
For starting afresh, for deciding to move on.

For calling up and saying, that you can't make it today.
For calling up and asking, can we meet today?

Note to Self

Contentment is happiness.
Ambition is resentment.
or
Is Contentment stagnation
And ambition the kiss of life?

And freedom for the world

T'was once a molten mass,
The goodness trapped inside.
Fires of hell and brimstone outside,
Serene love, trapped inside.

T'was time for the colours trapped,
To be unravelled to the universe, in full blossom and glory.
Big Bang! And the fire of hatred imploded to the depths.
And the spring of life, out on the surface, for the stars to shine upon and the rest to behold.

Countless revolutions, rotations and explosions,
The springs are turning to fire, waters of life to poisons of contempt.
The comtemp on the surface, eclipsing the lava within.

A breeze untouched, by the demoniac tornadoes,
Asks the Lord, will you be a spectator to this?
To the self-destruction of morality and life?

Doubt not my inaction, I am the wisest of the wise.
Let them be merry, in revelry and avarice.
They are not grateful, those who call themselves humans.

They shall castigate my name,
Trade it with the devil.
Let them believe, as they do;
Enjoy their moments of treachery, before the moment of annihilation.

Annihilation it shall be,
The cycle shall repeat,
To dust life shall turn once more,
Redemption for the souls,
And freedom for the world.

Random Fact

The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.

Random Fact

It was discovered on a space mission that a frog can throw up.

The frog throws up it's stomach first, so the stomach is dangling out of it's mouth.
Then the frog uses it's forearms to dig out all of the stomach's contents and then swallows the stomach back down again.

EEEUWWWW!

Choice

What would you prefer-
A moderate society in danger of extremism.
An extremist race, struggling to break into liberism.
?

Note to Self

For every tear supressed.
There is a smile i cannot forget.

For every weapon I've raised.
I crossed a bridge to redemption.

For every decision I regretted,
There is a lesson I've learnt for life.

For every moment of sin,
I've had a lesson in humility.

'I'm gonna go up and say-KISS MY ASS'

It didn't really turn out as planned.
It was more like - You scratch my back I scratch yours.

Civil Services? You must be joking - III & Bad days at work

Why civil services?
I need to feel that I'm doing something worthwhile with my life.
And besides, there's free travel, free food, free electricity, free telephone... :)
---

Bad days at work

I've been going through a rough patch at work lately.
Or rather, ever since I started work.
It's time I did something about it.
Can't take the shit no more.

What do they mean by 'serve your clients'?
I'd rather brand their asses with - I am a dork.
I'm sick of being labelled a resource -
Wasn't I supposed to be human?

That's it.
Have to muster up the balls.
I make my decisions from now.
They can lick ass if they want; I won't.

How and why did I forget-
The only one stopping me is me.

Today's the day.
I'm gonna go up and say-
Kiss my ASS.

Civil Services? You must be joking - II

Have shortlisted Geography as the optional for prelims.
For mains - Geograpy and Political Science.
Subject to change? - hopefully not :)

Civil Services? You must be joking

I've done a lot of thinking lately, and have decided to try my luck in the Indian Civil Services.
I'll need to make a lot of sacrifices, at work and at home.

At the same time, success is not really close to being a possibility for me, considering my hectic work schedules and.
But there are some things you want to do because you are convinced you CAN do them. Potential failure then ceases to become a deterrent.

Why do I want to do it? I have this feeling in some corner of my intestines that I can make it.
One might argue that this feeling has gotten me into a lot of trouble and heartache along the way. But I'm willing to give it a shot.

This may also seem to some as being a blatant case of professional suicide.
I can safely assume that I will lead a comfortable life if I choose to remain in my present field of occupation.
Not to mention the salaries only sore from where I'm standing now.

I have no presumptions. I know at the back of my head that only a fool will expect certain sucess at the exams. But i'm giving it a shot.

While I'm at it, I've shortlisted the following three subjects as my potential optionals for the UPSC Prelims in 2008 -
1 - Geography
2 - Political Science and International Relations
3 - Psychology

As of now Geography seems to be the winner hands down.
More to follow.